Posted by: Witch Doctor | September 10, 2008

Pink pudding and warm cheese scones

Everyone has A Past.

Even The Witch Doctor.

The Oldest Sage Witch sent a telegram to The Parallel Universe to find out whether The Witch Doctor had done something in the past that might turn her into a trembling bundle of witch bones if The General Witching Council were to hear about it.

She has.

Apparently many milleniums ago, when she was A Very Junior Witch Doctor, she stole.

Everyone else was stealing so she just did it too.

At the time she didn’t consider it stealing. She thought it was sustenance.

But now that she is older and wiser, she knows it was Theft.

The theft happened nearly every night in an A and E Department of what was then one of the largest hospitals in the UK.

Somehow, by magic during The Witching Hour, a huge bundle of freshly baked cheese scones found its way to one particular room in the Casualty Department.

They were Illegal Magic Scones.

They should not have been baked. And they should not have been eaten.

During The Witching Hour, these Warm Cheese Scones attracted doctors from far and wide. By the morning there was not a crumb left, and no-one in charge knew the magic had happened.

On a good night, a Pot of Pink Pudding magically appeared too, along with the scones.

Many of the doctors supped The Pink Pudding as they ate their scones, others poured it over the warm cheese scone.

Rumour had it, that The Pot of Pink Pudding was not magic at all but was the left overs from the patients’ lunch.

Many believed The Pink Pudding was destined to become Pig Swill.

So, The Witch Doctor not only stole, but she prevented the fattening up of the local pig population.

She really loved her Nights of Pink Pudding.

Although she never, ever poured it over her Warm Cheese Scone.

Absolutely not.

Witches may steal from pigs, but we don’t eat like them!

I wonder what they’ll try to dig up about Dr Scot Jnr.



  2. […] We witches know that we might be made scapegoats if we deviate even slightly from the constraints imposed upon us when we try to do our best in the practice of medicine nowadays. Things are quite different from the way they once were many years ago. Indeed, more than likely The Witch Doctor would be sacked nowadays for her midnight feasts theft of pigswill pink pudding and warm cheese scones. […]

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