Posted by: Witch Doctor | October 18, 2008

The abacus must be wrong!

It is always a terrible problem for all of us witches when Dr Grumble pontificates.

You never know what he’s going to come away with next.

Last week he was scratching his head over the cost of Connecting for Health.

He couldn’t understand it.

Then The Jobbing Doctor started thinking about it too and got bombarded in a hailstorm of antipodean wrath.

Dr Pal is just not going to stand for that.

Dr Grumble is still chewing over computer chaos in the NHS.

Anyway, it was time to get The Abacus out and round up all The Coven.

Here are the sums they’ve come up with.

They’re probably all wrong.

There weren’t enough beads on The Abacus.

1 (One)
10 (Ten)
100 (Hundred)
1000 (Thousand)
10,000 (Ten thousand)
100,000 (Hundred thousand)
1,000,000 (Million)
10,000,000 (Ten million)
100,000,000 (Hundred million)
1,000,000,000 (Thousand million)
10,000,000,000 (Ten thousand million)
100,000,000,000 (Hundred thousand million)
1,000,000,000,000 (Billion)
1,000,000,000,000,000,000 (Trillion)

Dr Grumbles figures:

“Cost of 50 million health records – £50 billion”

ie cost of 50,000,000 health records = £50,000,000,000,000

Cost of 1 health record = £50,000,000,000,000 / 50,000,000

= £1,000,000

So taking the upper possibility of the upper end of the projected cost of CfH, every record costs £1 million pounds.

Suppose that’s an overestimate.

Here’s a conservative estimate:

ie cost of 50,000,000 health records = £10,000,000,000,000

Cost of 1 health record = £10,000,000,000,000 / 50,000,000


So, depending on the overall cost of this endeavor each patent record will cost somewhere between £200,000 and £1,000,000 to launch into cyberspace.

Patient Choice.

It is a pity that all the patients in the land appear to have chosen to have all their data uploaded on to a potentially insecure system rather that be given a personal windfall from the government of somewhere between £200,000 and £1 million pounds each to liberate them from poverty and/or to help them to set up their own various imaginative small businesses in order to give the British Economy some backbone.

But the voters couldn’t be trusted with that sort of money.

They couldn’t be relied upon to spend it wisely.

Could they?

Hmm. These figures just have to be wrong.

For pity’s sake check them for yourself with a modern calculator.

Hey. What’s a billion?

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