Posted by: Witch Doctor | September 21, 2010

The Exit Business and Dirty Dying


They say, particularly during times of a troubled economy, you should not have all your eggs in one basket. It might be wise, therefore for a business to diversify into a service that is resistant to an economic downturn.

Businesses relating to death will survive the recession. They do not need to diversify, they just need to advertise. Because of demographic change, they are likely to substantially increase their profits as the baby boomers age and eventually succumb. Indeed it may be that The Baby Boomers, being an assertive bunch, who are used to being very much in control of their lives, would demand that they should have a final Big Boom when they die. They may indeed want imaginative funerals.  But in the days leading up to death, what will they want?

Dr Nitschke, the Australian who runs Exit International and is also nick-named Dr Death, last night on radio 4 was of the opinion that The Baby Boomers would want to be in control of their deaths to the extent they would want to choose where and when they died.

The Witch Doctor disagrees with this. She thinks the majority of Baby Boomers love life so much that they think they are eternal and will continue to feel this way till the moments leading up to death. She thinks most of them will adapt to unfortunate and painful changes in their physiology as they age, and will find quite innovative ways of coping. However, there will be a “precious minority” who think a nice tidy death will somehow be a “good death.” There are a few aberrant “twee” individuals born during the Baby Boomer years but they do not represent The Baby Boomers who are colourful, imaginative, and are accustomed to dealing competently with the unexpected and the messiness of life. They are not in the least “twee.” Their concept of freedom will not include dying. It is likely they will not even want to discuss death because they know they can cope with anything that life throws at them.

So where is all this noise about assisted suicide coming from?

It is not from these “Tidy Twees” of the world. We witches think they are being used. We think it originates from a few of The Humankind who have various types of psychological needs that require them to see themselves as a type of “leader” capable of controlling the thoughts of others when they are at their most vulnerable.

Yes, that is what we witches think!

Anyway, all this is beside the point. There may still be a good market in death for these life-loving Baby Boomers because their spouses, children and siblings may decide they need an unconventional funeral. This will have the effect of boosting the sales of some of the members of Dying Matters.

Check out this section of their website. You will not find the names of individual members there. You will find all sorts of services. These services are for those approaching the end of life and afterwards. You will find the NHS features there – and charities. But there are many private businesses too.

The witch doctor does not consider this alphabetical list to be a “membership.” To her it seems to be more of a tour around the “marketplace.”

To prove it to you, try to find businesses that will stuff your cremated ashes into fireworks and all the other unsavory things mentioned in the last post.

You will find them there.

It seems Dying Matters is diversifying into the “Death Market.” Not only that, but they are doing everything within their power to ensure it is “A Jovial Death Market.”


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