Posted by: Witch Doctor | October 8, 2011

Welcome to the new NHS that pre-empts The Law


Well, My Black Cat, Polly Toynbee has sure got her knickers in a twist over the Health and Social Care Bill!

And quite right too!


“As it levers the NHS open to EU competition law, who is democratically accountable for its £120bn budget? Who is to answer for its quality or failures? Who commands its privatised fragments in times of crisis or pandemic? The Lords have a duty to scrutinise the most contentious parts of a bill railroaded through the Commons in just two days after the “pause”, with 1,000 new amendments undebated. “The fundamental principles remain” boasted Andrew Lansley at his party conference: not much changed. Scrutiny of slapdash legislation is what the Lords are for.

They should be constitutionally affronted that this colossal reorganisation is already imposed on the NHS without waiting for their consent. No one can remember a similar case of pre-legislative implementation, as if parliament were irrelevant.”

She mentions the “Scandal of the Haxby GP practice.”

We thought it was a bit scandalous too. Didn’t we My Black Cat?

Indeed, The Witch Doctor has spent some time contemplating the letter sent to NHS patients served by the Haxby Group Practice.

After getting over the scandal, The Witch Doctor is quite tickled by the bit about Boxtox and Dermal Fillers coming soon. Indeed the Witch Doctor is in great need of Boxtox herself and has blogged about this before.

Or rather, she blogged about Boxtox’s big cousin Botox.

It was in 2004 that dentists first started to Creep.


It has taken seven years for the GP’s to Creep.

Seven is, of course, The Witching Number, so witches and black cats throughout the UK all expected 2011 would be the year Botox would take off within the medical profession.

And lo!

It has.

So GP Boxtox is coming to Yorkshire.

And GP Botox is already alive and well in Cumbria

Having embraced Botox, The Witch Doctor can’t for the life of her see why GPs should not expand their repertoire to include body piercing and tattooing. After all there is a risk of infection in these procedures and GPs are all trained in microbiology, sterilisation of equipment and the hazards of cross infection. And furthermore, GPs have always been dab hands with needles and syringes.

Who is better qualified than GPs to do these things?

And there would be a further treble whammy if GPs embraced Botox AND body piercing and tattooing, My Black Cat.

It would turn general practice into an art form, so it would embrace the concept of the Art of Medicine as well as the Change and Choice mantra.

The government will surely be clapping their hands in glee as doctors take time out from their NHS patients to build up a clientele of wizened, wrinkled witches and colourful scary youngsters who want holes drilled in their bodies.

And in so doing help boost the economy!

Eh, My Black Cat?

redapple.jpg a red apple ……………………

The Witch Doctor – Link to a random page





© Dlundin |


  1. I read Polly Toynbee at work last night and never was the fate of the NHS so clearly put.

    I hope all of the Lords read it.

    Anna :o]

  2. Our local surgery has offered botox for a few years now, and reflexology, Reiki, permanent hair removal, hypnotherapy, other ‘holistic therapies’…
    I noticed the leaflets and posters when I was there, found it faintly dodgy, but don’t go to the doctor’s very often so assumed it was normal nowadays.
    In a possibly not unrelated occurrence, shortly after the cervical cancer jab was offered to parents of 13 year old girls (may have exact age wrong), my then 17 year old daughter and many of her friends all got letters from the surgery offering the vaccination to their older age group for £200-300 (forget the exact amount). Some parents, including a single parent on low income, paid for it. I dithered and felt gulity at not stumping up, then a while later saw an NHS ad in one of her teen mags about the vaccination being rolled out to the older age group. This time, though, there were no letters from the surgery advising us of its availability at no cost. it took several phone calls to check when it would be available, but she did have it, on the NHS, eventually. I still feel bad at not paying for it though.

  3. Anna,

    I think the Lords know the score. They don’t need any further lobbying. The question is whether they respond to whipping. I hope not but wait with bated breath. We witches think democracy is well and truly being put to the test right now.


    The Witch Doctor is gobsmacked and doesn’t know what to say….
    You have silenced a witch and that takes some doing!
    However, My Black Cat is of the opinion that your comment may stimulate a few posts on this blog soon on alternative medicine, medical enrepreneurs and, of course, Creep!

  4. Ooer.
    Had a look for the letter about vaccination in case I’d kept it: nope, but found a letter about the NHS one, so I was wrong to say we weren’t told about it.
    Here is the surgery homepage, see the Clinics & Services, top left:

    • Aah… The “Peak Perfection Clinics” is where it all happens. As far as I can see it doesn’t say who exactly will be doing Botox and some of these other services, whether they function as separate businesses working as associates, who owns them, and who carries the responsibility for them. The Haxby Group have made it more explicit.

  5. […] Black Cat has just been reading the comments on the last post and she said she was reminded of a dream she once […]

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